Honestly I think many women (and men) are born worriers.  

I was not.  

As a young child I was an extremely carefree spirit (just ask my family).

I had no fear,

or worry in the world.  

That all changed dramatically when I was 8 1/2 years old.  

A very close friend was killed in a car accident.

I was at my Dad's when it happened.

From that moment on I feared leaving my mom and my sister.

I would have panic attacks when they would leave even for a few hours.

Fear and worry overtook my mind anytime I was away from home or my family.

Fast forward a few years, when I was 14, another very dear friend was killed in a car accident.

I was at home this time.

A couple of months after the 2nd accident I realized that it didn't matter where I was.

Then I carried my fear and worry with me everywhere.

For the most part I hid it very well, no one outside of my very tight circle knew this was a struggle.

I would hide my tears when leaving on overnight trips.

I learned to cry without making a sound.

Two years later the man who had the greatest influence on my life, my Granddaddy,  

passed away after a long battle with various illnesses.

Again the fear and worry struck this time with a vengeance.  

On the outside I appeared to deal with it all well,

on the inside I struggled desperately.  

All I wanted was to have my fear and worry comforted.

I knew God but I didn't have a relationship with him.

He was just the person I asked why to all the time.

Why did he allow this to happen to me...

Why couldn't I be from a family with more money...

Why were my parents divorced...

Why was I not able to do this or that...

Soon college came and I turned from asking why,

to seeking comfort in other ways.

The first 8 months of my college career could have killed me,

but God watched over me,

he lead me away from that life.

He brought a constant source of comfort to me,

God knew what I needed and he sent that comfort

in the form of my favorite farmer.

As time passed God gently nudged me into a full blown relationship with Him,

where I find myself completely lost without Him.

Last night was one of those nights where I felt lost.

I couldn't get hold of the farmer on the phone,

it was late and the same old worries and fears started to rise in my heart.  

When these fears arise, panic sets in...

what am I going to do if something happens to the farmer,

what about our farmboys??

I have learned in these times I have to mentally stop myself,

and refocus on God.

Everything that happens is all part of His plan, 

and His plan is far better than ours.

And then I pray...

praising Him for His love,

thanking Him for our blessings,

and begging Him for guidance.

This the verse that plays repeatedly in my head during these moments

Why do you worry??  

Share in the comments.

Until we meet again...

Caci

We got married on one of the hottest days in July of 2005.  

In Georgia no less.

Which my bridesmaids loved 

(they were all wearing full length black gowns :)   

We had an afternoon thunderstorm 

which created some humidity to say the least.

But it was an amazing day full of family, friends, and fun.  

I am so amazed that God created someone so loving, patient and kind.  

 Fast forward a few years, kids, and cars later.

I am more in love with him now than I was then.

He has taught me so much over the years.

And the amount of grace and love he has shown me could float Noah's ark again. 

It was an awesome read for me!  I loved it, gave a copy away on the blog (this post), and have told all my girlfriends about it.  

Well now Courtney has decided to do a book club!! YAY!!  You can read more about it on her site Women Living Well. 

Wow!! I can't believe today is a NEW YEAR!!

2014...I remember partying like it's 1999...

this year will have lots of things to celebrate for our family and I can't wait!

I don't want to wish the days away, I want to live them and take them in...

I don't want to miss a thing!  

Every year on this day I think of all the great things I want to accomplish...

not just in this year but in life.  I think we must take on manageable bites otherwise we choke.  

So I have developed a list of 14 things I want to accomplish in 2014,

some personal, some spiritual but they affect each area of life.  

1. Pray about everything!  

I really mean literally everything.  God calls us to pray and seek his guidance not just on the big things in life but everything.  In 2014,  I want to seek him more than I have before.  I want to go to him and ask for his guidance in all areas of my life.  

2. Study Scripture Daily.

I have been studying God's word regularly for a few years but I have never cracked open the Bible daily.  I feel that God is calling me to commit to him and studying his words so I can learn more about Him and about who he has called me to be.

3.  Tithe 1st, not last.

This probably fits in with some other things I have on my list but I think it needs to stand alone.  I like to budget on paper down to the last red cent I have (probably some kind of control issue) but I realized when I looked at my spreadsheet tithes were at the end not at the beginning.  I must refocus and re-prioritize because he provides us with all that we need and all that we have! 

4. Memorize 12 verses of Scripture

Last year I attempted to memorize 24 and for me that is just too many.  I need to let things sink in and ferment.  So I am going to pick a scripture a month to memorize and apply daily to my life.  

5. Organize my life.

I need to get things in line.  Complete my Home Management Binder, update my billing system, put a filing system in order at home and at my office.  Not to mention labeling!

6. Declutter Our House

This one has been a goal for years and this year I have decided to tackle it a new way.  It's a 12 step kind of program.  I have broken down our house into manageable areas and given myself a month to complete each one, that way I have longer to work on it plus it gives me time to redecorate if I would like.  Really it's sad because our whole house should be manageable (we only have 4 rooms + a bathroom) but any ways..Here's the plan

January- Bathroom

February- Hall Closet (the one with shelves)

March- Living Room

April- Laundry Room/Back Porch (they are one in the same ;)

May- Coat Closet

June- Boys Bedroom

July- Boys Clothes closet

August- Kitchen

September- Boys Toy Closet

October- Our Bedroom (this is the most dreaded one)

November- Our Closet

December- Garage 

7. Set a daily schedule and stick to it!! 

 In the last month my commitment to my daily schedule has gone out the window.  I mean really I don't get up at the same time each day, we don't eat dinner at the same time, and we just kind of fly by the seat of our pants...which makes us all a little scattered.  So with the new year comes a set schedule that our family will have. 

8. Pay off Debt!!!

As much of it as possible!  The goal is to by the end of the year to only have the basic monthly bills plus my student loans to pay.  

9. Put at least $1000 in our savings account for a rainy day fund

I realize that the suggestion is 3-6 months of your salary but this would be a huge accomplishment for us.  

10.  Put at least $200 extra into each of the boy's savings account.

Currently most of the money in the boy's accounts is from gifts they have received from family and friends.  I want to make a concentrated effort to increase their savings amounts.    Plus we plan to let Wyatt show some market animals this year and our goal is for him to place all the money he makes into his savings account.  I did quick math the other day and figured up if he sold 1 market hog, 1 market lamb, and 1 steer each year for the next 13 years he would add at least $15,000 to his savings account and that is very low estimates.  We have to teach the boys financial responsibility now or they will struggle learning it later in life.

11.  Do a family outing once a month.  

Meaning together all 4 of us do something fun.  I'm not going to say non-farm related but ideally it would be going camping, movie night, etc.  We need to make more of an effort as an entire family to enjoy our time together.  As a farm family sometimes that's going to mean checking cows together or going to a sale but those memories are just as important if not more than the ones that happen when you spend money.

12.  Exercise 3 times a week and include the boys as often as possible.  

I need to be more active for myself.  I need to get healthier and one way is just to move more.  Because I don't get to stay at home all day with the boys I have used that as an excuse not to exercise as often as I should.  I want to motivate them to get outside and move more.  So I want to exercise with them.  Whether it's walking Flat Rock or playing Wii Fit we are going to try and do it together so that we all can benefit.

13.  Go on a date night just William & I once a month

Since adding baby boy #2 I realized that William & I don't ever really spend any time together just the 2 of us.  I think it's important for us to nurture our relationship and let our boys see that we are important to each other.  We have fallen into the trap of putting our boys before our marriage and we need to stop.  So this year I want to schedule more us time.  

14.  Post 60 blog post, plus keep our social media sites updated.

That's 5 blog post a month... 1.25/week I always have these great ideas to blog more and usually start out strong but fall by the way side.  This year I want to do better.  But that goal must be manageable and not take away from other areas in our life.  I also want to be sure we are sharing more photos on our social media sites so that folks can get a better glimpse of our farm life.  

So there you have it my 14 goals for 2014.  Let's see how these work out over the next 12 months!  What are your goals for 2014??

Caci

So sometimes I forget this little address of mine and then I feel guilty for not posting.  At some point my brain has a convo that goes something like this...

"umm Hello, you know that you are a 'blogger' so to speak right...yeah I guess...well don't you think you should WRITE something...probably but I AM SOOOO BUSY...yeah I suppose those 2 hours you spent pinning new hairstyles was hardwork ;)" 

Wyatt & Waylon on their Great-Great Grandfather's Restored John Deere

take kids to the doctor (again)...this time we had Fifths disease,


 sewing up a storm to complete orders for the Etsy shop & preparing for a craft show



 Shattered back glass on SUV,

visits to the hospital and nursing home to see PawPaw,

& this doesn't include the daily work going on at the farm of 

planting wheat, feeding cows, milking, hauling hay, fixing the mixer wagon, checking beef cows, and much much more.

And the Christmas season makes our lives even more hectic.
However our family is taking a few moments to remember the true reason we celebrate each day.
How?
With an advent calendar,
by donating food,
adopting a child for Christmas,
&
preparing our hearts. 

Stay tuned later this week for more on all of the above!

Until next time...

Caci

OH, Kindergarten...

Dropping your kid off at school for the first time it can be dreadful for all involved!

But it can also remind us of our WANTS in life...

For me it reminds me I want to be a stay-at-home mom! 

Not just any stay-at-home mom,

you know the ones who drops their kid(s) off in yoga pants,

not because they have been to yoga but that it the only thing they EVER wear.

(Please note not hating maybe jealous but not hating...and remember this is my dream so)

No I want to be the SAH mom is always fashionable,

 makes Pinterest ideas look silly

and who's house is impeccably clean.

 I want to be a stay-at-home mom who's kids are always well-dressed and well mannered.

And can recite all the books of the Bible in order,

as well as know the references numerous veres you might need on a regular basis.

Basically I want to be June Cleaver and Martha Stewart all rolled into one fashionable momma!

 But that's not my life, 

and let's face it that's not reality~

 I'm a full-time working mom

 who has more Pintoristy's than Pin successes, 

My fashion gets a little stale 

as jeans/slacks and a company shirt can be my go to work attire

 (and no one would notice or care)

I do good to remember my Bible study time and to ensure he has said his prayers,

much less quiz him on the catcheism.

I'm a mom who has to choke back tears on the first day, 

until I get back to the car to buckle the baby his car seat and then opens the flood gates,

to which I promptly tell myself to suck it up 

because guess what I had to go to work 

and "ain't nobody got time for that"

I'm  the mom who carts the pump back and forth daily,

constantly worried do I have enough milk for the little one.

All the while getting engrossed in what I am doing and forgeting to pump

(dang I should probably pump now)

Ok so there you have it....

what I want to be vs what I am...

I'm not unhappy with my path in life, 

just as humans we always want more...

we want what's on the other side...

But in light of recent events with friends 

today I am thankful and overjoyed that God has blessed me.

He has blessed me with an amazing husband, who is hard working and dedicated.

He has blessed me with 2 healthy boys

He has blessed me with a job that is somewhat flexible.

He has blessed me with a church family that loves me as if I was their own flesh & blood.

SO many blessings that I don't take the time to look at,

because all I can see is what I want.  

Take a moment today and thank God for your blessings.

Until Next time,

Caci

Last week was VBS week at our church.  

It was a great week...

a long, hard week but great!  

Here are some pics

Use me Jesus use me.  Take this life of mine and use me.

Use me Jesus use me.  Keep me by your side and use me.

All I want is to be with you, to ever praise you in all I do.

Teach me Father to learn your ways, and walk with me each day.

Mould me make me, what you would have me be.

I only want to serve you faithfully. Help me Father to truly see

Teaching our children is extremely important...especially teaching them about Jesus.

Check out my Pinterest board Teaching My Children to find amazing ways to teach your children.  

Until Next time....

Caci

I never realized how much and how often in a marriage you are ask not only for give-and-take
 and sometimes to submit.

Now growing up no one would've called me a submissive person. 

I bucked the rules at every chance I got. 

At every stop along the way I had questions
I wasn't going to go down without a fight.

 I was always what you would call
a spitfire,
a troublemaker, 

 one that was gonna blaze their own path in the world 

no one was gonna hold me down 

That's me on the right with Gumby...

funny how things change as you grow older and wiser 

how the right person in your life can change everything 

and is even more amazing how God works in your life 

even when you're fighting him as hard as you're fighting the rest of the world

That's me on the right at the 2001 National FFA Convention

in 2001 I graduated high school 

tomorrow marks 12 years since I walked across the football field  

and was able to turn the first of four tassels 

it was a bittersweet day for me

 I remember without a doubt it I focus was on my plan for my life

 I wasn't worried what anyone else had planned for me 

I knew where I wanted to go
I knew what my goals were

(I was so determined to get away my aunt got me a complete set of luggage for a graduation present)

what I didn't know was what God's plan was for me

fast-forward:
about 10 months later in my second semester of college 

I met this guy in my calculus class 

he was living down the hall for me,
that guy turned out to be my future husband 

I didn't know it then but on that day 11 years ago my life was changed.

God was working in my life in a way that I never could imagine 

God was using me to do things that I didn't even know about

Upon starting to date William things are to change shortly 

my focus was no longer so much I'm partying and hanging out with my friends 

I worked building a relationship with him 

it quickly became evident (to both he and I) that we were in this for long hall haul 

 3 years & 3 months after we started dating we were married

This is still my favorite picture from our wedding

The reason I started listening

Our family on Mother's Day 2013

So until next time...

Caci

Faithful Fridays are a new addition to the blog this year!  I thought it might be great once a week to post on how I am trying to remain faithful to God.  This post keeps me accountable for my daily time with God.  It also gives me a chance at least once a week to focus on the blessings God has bestowed upon our family.  Some weeks that is much harder than others!!

So how have my faith based goals gone the first 11 days in the new year??

Goal 1: was to memorize 24 verses of scripture.  I am still working on my 1st verse of the year but will be adding number 2 next week!  I do have the basics of the verse hidden in my heart and will continue to work on it.  I have found myself turning to my index card binder often over the past 11 days to remind myself of the verse and to go before the Lord in prayer.  

Goal 2: was to spend more time in prayer and allow God to guide me.  I feel that I haven't spent nearly as much time in prayer  as I would have liked.  I need to be more dedicated and purposeful with my prayer time.  I catch myself praying throughout the day about little things but I feel that I also need to set aside some quiet time morning, noon, and night to do some focused prayer time.  As far as letting God guide me...well there are many times when I am not sure if I am doing my will or God's.  I try to make sure that what I am doing is pleasing to the Lord and that I am looking to him in all aspects of life not just in the big stuff.  I want to make sure that I am living my life for him all the time not just when it's easy.  I think my biggest struggle here is deals with finances.  It's hard to give up control to God and know that he will provide for our needs.  

Goal 3: was to read through the entire Bible in a year.  This one has been a little difficult as it requires you to set aside time each day to read between 4-5 chapters of the Bible.  I have gotten behind a couple of times but I am happy to say that currently I am caught up and have completely read the book of Ezra!  1 book down and 65 to go!  The weekends seem to be the hardest for me as we don't have a structured day on the weekends.  

In addition to these goals I also spend other times with the Lord.  I was blessed this week to get together with my WIC group on Wednesday night for a good girls night.  We enjoy a meal together, pray together, and study God's word.  We are working through Beth Moore's "David, Seeking a Heart Like His."  I have really enjoyed this study.  God has used this study to guide me in many ways!  I also really enjoy just spending time with the ladies in my group.  The majority of us are all in the same stage in life...we are 30ish, married, with kids and have full time jobs.  We do have ladies in our group who don't fit that description and I think that it's great!  Those ladies offer us a different insight into how God's word works in their life.  Many times we are so caught up in ours we forget that the same scripture may work differently in one life than the other...but the idea is the same...God is working in their life!  

Next week my Good Morning Girls group starts their study in Luke!  I am very excited for this study.  It's an 8 week study.  I am leading a Facebook group through the study.  I have tried this before and it worked out ok but I lost motivation because other's in the group weren't interacting.  I pray that the new group helps to keep up my motivation!  

I also try to work a little each day on vacation Bible school (VBS).  I do this so that I don't feel overwhelmed later in the year, which this year is even more important as we are expecting baby #2 in March.  I am happy to say we have dates set, starting to line up volunteers, and working on set design already!

So right now my typical day includes multiple small burst of time with the Lord.  I am thankful for the time I can spend with him alone but I also enjoy the time I spend with him and my family and friends.  Each type of interaction with the Lord blesses us greatly.  

Oh and by the way...I have to say HAPPY NATIONAL MILK DAY

So take a moment and let me know how are your faith based new year's goal going?  

Caci